Thursday, February 10, 2011

Called to be Faithful

I'm feeling much better about my writing now. I'll tell you why. By the time Monday night rolled around I was in a serious funk. However, just before leaving the house, I had had a revelation, which was a source of wonderment for me. And then we conversed and well, I'll just tell you how it all happened...

I was putting away groceries out in the other freezer in the garage. The thought went through my mind as I did so that I might spend a tremendous amount of time and effort on my writing over the course of the rest of my life - and I might never see the results I want to. Suddenly, I was reminded of a little marble plaque I have sitting on my kitchen windowsill. It was given to me just a few weeks ago. It says, "We are not called to be succesful; we are called to be faithful." What a thunderbolt that was! If I am called to write - and I believe I am, by virtue of how much thought I give it - then it doesn't matter if anyone ever publishes me again. I am only to write. That is all. God will take care of the rest.

I was telling this to Melissa that night and she started nodding her head. She said it reminded her of a song by some Christian performer that I need to go YouTube. He has a song about singing on a "little stage" - if that's what glorifies God.

I then went on to express to her how I wished I just didn't feel things so much. I have often wished that in life, apart from writing. I tend to adopt a careless, "tough" attitude and it's because it's the opposite of what is really going on. I am a highly sensitive person. I also have an amazing memory. So, I can remember hurts absorbed when I was a five year old. Seriously. It's a burden. And so I'm taking writing rejection pretty hard, as a result. But Melissa looked at me and said, "But Sarah - that's what makes you a good writer! You can express emotions on the page because you've already felt them!" I had never thought of it like that before. Hmmm....

So this new purpose in life has been an encouragement to me this week. I don't have to make it big in writing. In fact, I never have to be published again. But what I have to do is to keep writing, because that's my calling.

And then, I have taken some practical steps. I am realizing that while I have some natural ability, to think I am going to make it on that is nonsense. There is always going to be someone out there more talented than I am. So, I picked up an issue of Writer's Digest the other night and I am slowly going through it. I am even reading the ads. The world of writing is SO much bigger than I realized! I'm going to subscribe to it. I also plan to buy the 2011 Christian Writers Guide. FaithWriters offers on-line classes. I'm fitting them into my days. I will never be so good that I can't get better.

And I'm just going to keep pressing forward. I don't know what will happen and you know what? It really doesn't matter. My life is just a vapor, as the Psalmist reminds us. I've probably already lived almost half of it. It really matters not a whit if someday there is a book with my name on the cover. So what? A couple of generations from now and even my descendants won't know who I was. But this is what will matter: when I make my arrival into Heaven, meet my King, and am told, "Well done, thou good and faithful servant."

That's all that matters. Nothing more.


  1. This one really hit home with me dear one. I believe you are meant to write devotionals, but that is just me! Endless times I have prayed for toughening up of my heart. I use to act tougher be harder to survive the atmosphere I was immersed in. I fought so hard for so many years to be tougher. I am trying to just be who I am as long as that behavior/character is not sinful. People that I have met since having Jewel do not believe how I use to be. "No way". Frank knows. My family tells me "I've gone soft" I do not have the gift of writing, but I know God wastes nothing so my tender heart must be for good somehow. I might never know this side of Heaven. I hate being tender hearted so much hurt goes with it and worry about hurting others. But it is for a reason.

  2. I am so glad you got that bit of encouragement! You are always such an encouragement to others--it's nice to see it come back to bless you, too.

    You won't regret Writer's Digest! Great stuff. I'm keeping my back issues for reference. I have the 2011 Guide, so let me know when you get it and we can compare notes. :)