Coarse Talking

This is the post I alluded to in my last posting that I wanted to write. I had intended to get to it before now, but, well - you know how that goes! So, guess when I am doing this? 11:30 pm on a Sunday night! I should be in bed. I took a nap today, which was a mistake. Any time I nap I have a hard time being sleepy enough for bedtime. But yet, there is something about Sunday afternoons that makes me just want to crawl into bed and stay there all afternoon!

All right. Well, I had two things happen the week before last that got me to thinking. The first was this: I enjoy music. I've written about that before. I'm not particular about what kind of music I listen to - I enjoy most everything. Sometimes I wonder if I am hurting my children because I do listen to some secular music and I do not forbid them from doing the same. It's just one area of life that I have chosen not to be tyrannical about and let them make their own choices. Interestingly enough, they all seem to prefer Christian music over everything (well, Ben loves Elvis and the Beach Boys, but overall, he still likes Christian music) anyway. I'm getting off track here and this subject alone may be a future post at some point. One song I have heard on the radio and thought was cute is the song "Hot N Cold" by Katy Perry. I'm not a fan of Miss Perry, by any means. Any person who can start out as a Christian recording artist and then switch over to the secular field, drawn by the lure of more success, does not have my respect. And it doesn't help that her first hit was a song entitled, "I Kissed a Girl." I've never heard it, I have no idea if it has lesbian undertones or not, but I'm doing quite well in my ignorance.

Anyway, I had heard "Hot N Cold" and so a couple of weeks ago I had a list of songs I wanted to download off itunes and burn to a cd (which reminds me - I'm giving serious thought to purchasing an mp3 player at some point - haven't decided yet. But it would be more convenient than having all these cds. But yet, I need to protect my hearing and ear buds aren't the greatest for that. Plus, I like to dance around the kitchen when I cook and I'd rather just put a cd in my player out there rather than be hooked up to a set of earphones. See what happens when I get too tired? My mind wanders all over the place!) So I downloaded and burned the song. Then, I went to listen to it. I was so shocked when in the second line of the song, a pretty crude word is used! If I had known that was there, I would not have bought this song. The very next day I was listening to the radio, to our easy listening station and "Hot N Cold" came on. I turned it up because I wanted to hear - had I missed this awful word every time I'd heard the song on the radio? No, I had not! The radio station beeped out the word and I never knew it. I just found myself aggravated by this.

Then, this happened: I belong to a Yahoo stroke support group. I'm not very active at all, especially now that I'm 2.5 yrs now post stroke. My left side will probably never have the full strength it did before, but I'm actually feeling very good most days. When I joined I was overwhelmed with everything - feeling lousy, so, so, so sleep-deprived, and still a bit in shock that I had had a stroke at age 36! So it was helpful to me at the time. Unfortunately, a number of people on the list seemed a bit bitter to me. But I can understand that, too. When you aren't a Christian and don't have a belief system in place that a loving God cares for you, even during the rough times, it would be very easy to develop a bad attitude over life's circumstances. And for many people, for most people, in fact, strokes are completely life-altering. So, I can't say I completely condemn them for their attitudes. But at any rate, it did make me less inclined to do much on there.

Now, I knew they had established a Facebook group within the past year or so and I did want to join that. Even if I didn't do anything with it, I always enjoy looking at others' groups that they are a a part of. It gives me an idea of who they are and what is important to them. I would not mind being affiliated with a stroke recovery group because I did have a stroke and, as a result, it's a medical thing that I'm more aware of now and more sympathetic about with others. So, I asked someone in the group to send me the link. Without looking at it, I clicked on it and was immediately taken to the Facebook group called "Strokes Suck." I was just appalled. As my hand hovered over the "Join" button, I put it down. As much as I would enjoy being part of a stroke group, I don't want every one of my 200 and some Facebook friends getting notice that "Sarah joined Strokes Suck."

I know "suck" isn't a swear word, and neither was the word in the Katy Perry song. But they are crude. I don't use these words and others like them. Well, hardly ever, anyway. I did refer to Senator Ben Nelson as a "Jack 'Donkey'" awhile back because I was so mad at him during the time of the health care debate. But I shouldn't have. It's not ladylike. It's not Christ-edifying and it does nothing to enhance my Christian testimony. There have been times the boys have let loose with some of these crude-isms and then haven't understood when I've told them that kind of language isn't allowed. "It's not a swear word!" they protest. I think I've done a pretty good job of explaining why it's not appropriate to use these words, even though it's more of a subjective thing - in this case, subjective to what Mom says!

I don't remember hearing a lot of these words growing up. Of course, my parents really sheltered us from the media, but I suspect they weren't as prevalent then. I can flip on the tv to any prime time show now and hear really, really vulgar language. It's shy of swearing, but wrong, nonetheless. And if you go to any movie that's rated higher (or lower, as the case may be) than "G" you're going to hear crude language.

Am I being legalistic? A prude? A little old lady? I really don't think so. I don't mentally condemn someone when I hear them use language like this, but it does affect how I view them. It's worldly. I find it offensive, even.

The book of James has a lot to say about the tongue, primarily about the things we do with it, more so than the actual words we use. But it's a good manual anyway, for how we ought to be talking. I don't think Jesus would join the group "Strokes Suck" or use any of the language I'm thinking about here tonight. And if we can't imagine Him doing it, then we shouldn't either.

We don't have to talk like they did in past centuries. We do live in a much more casual society than ever has been had before and there's room for some the vernacular of today. But we need to be careful that our speech doesn't mirror the World's so closely that others don't even know we are different.

I'm trying to raise gentlemen at my house and this is one thing I'm trying to impress on them about their speech habits. And it's something I need to remind myself about too.

Colossians 4:6 "Let your speech always be with grace..."